Just before the pandemic, I was at a restaurant. A couple was sitting next to me.

Woman: (Says something about Fiona)

Man: Who's Fiona?

Woman: (Shocked, disgusted face) You don't KNOW Fiona????

I bet she broke up with him on the spot.

Man, pop-up headlights are sexy

Me at the grocery store yesterday: "These cookies look delicious! And they're 90% off!"

Wife: "Those are lactation cookies..."

Me: "I didn't know that was a thing... They still look good though..."

That, or you'd get crushed alive since the car wasn't designed to actually protect you...

https://youtu.be/C_r5UJrxcck

People like this drive me crazy.

Years ago, a family member (who was on my mobile phone family account) was getting charged monthly for some mobile game. I would point it out every month, and they were like "Yeah...I need to cancel that..."

It took over a year for them to get around to canceling it.

All that fancy hardware in the pro, and only a handful of games will actually be "enhanced". Otherwise, it "may stabilize or improve the performance of supported PS4 and PS5 games."

Seems kind of a waste to me.

I know a medical coder that works exclusively with an ER. Oh the stories I've heard...

Earlier this week, YouTube for Android TV had an update that caused it to crash at startup.

On a hot steak there, Google...

LaRosa's Pizza for me!

I want this.

Me every morning

I went to an all-boys Catholic highschool. I had a teacher that was a Christian Brother. One day he had an argument with a classmate over how effective condoms were. He basically argued that condoms don't work. (Even arguing that a Ziploc bag couldn't keep semen from escaping.)

This teacher was pretty popular because he was a character, who'd sometimes make crude jokes.

After graduating, some friends and a I ran into him at a mall. He asked us "What are you guys up to? Picking up little girls?"

We laughed it off thinking he was still his same old jovial self.

Not long after, I heard that this same teacher had been arrested for being involved with minors. His "joke" that day seemed like some major projection.

I was browsing news headlines. Me: "Why is Johnny Gaudreau trending..."

Reading out loud to my wife, I first read it as "Johnny Gaudreau's brother died". Reading it a second time, the utter dread sunk in.

What a way to find out.

Finding out that it was the day before their sister's wedding...a tremendous tragedy.

He'll be missed.

Sign language for I love you?

I recently started using an app called Hermit to address a similar problem. It lets you create "lite apps" from any URL. Maybe it'd work for you?

https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.chimbori.hermitcrab

Had this last week. Pretty tasty.

This photo makes me legit nervous.

Women are so cute and beautiful but I think they are talking about getting their horse in a koozie

Looks right up my alley. I'll have to give the demo a try.

We have a 2012 Ford Fiesta that we call "Siesta". That car sucks a good amount. Been meaning to get rid of it for years now.

Hisstine Daaé is my favorite character

It's funny how I still think about this when I see this brand. I used to buy bags of their dry beans, but I now avoid them entirely.

Change the dog to me, and replace the leash with a lawn mower.

One of my all-time favorite musicians/bands.

Erik Petersen's death truly shocked me. He's been missed.

Now to stick him in the closet until winter

Did City Beat also do the Cincy chili week some months back?

That sounds extremely good. I think I might be hungry...

One star off because the doctor is the one who hit them with a Mercedes

Are they smaller? These new IKEA plugs seem like they are less wide than the Third Reality ones, but they might stick out farther.

Either way, those Third Reality plugs are nice.

I have a neighbor directly behind me that has been doing the upside down flag thing for a while now. I think they started doing it after January 6.

These same neighbors also fly a don't tread flag.

I'm glad I haven't needed to interact with these dunces.

I was at this game today. It was nice that the Cardinals fans in the crowd were (mostly) kept quiet. 😁

Martini's performance today definitely makes the Ford snub seem like the right move.

Is he going to be this year's Derek Dietrich?

You and me both

I eat a spoonful of peanut butter on a daily basis. It's the best.

Spiderman: Homewrecker

Yes! Scrolling past it just now, I thought that's what they were.

I do this same thing all the time.

"Heyyy, it's THAT guy! Where is he from again...?"

I recently got into Energel and Uni-ball Signo pens. Sooo good.