That's the correct answer, just gaslight everyone into thinking you were always a girl they just didn't pay attention!

never hated women but yes XD

Entered late egg stage at 15 I kinda knew then, I repressed from 17 to 18+1/2, after that I started exploring my gender again (stuff like shaving leg, epilating, etc...) and eventually realised I wasn't living for myself but for others when I was 19 (2-3 months away from turning 20) and decided then and there that I would transition, I came out to my parents a month after and tried to get HRT immediately, at the same time I changed my pronouns and my name with them as well, it took me nearly five months to be able to start the treatment (had to store my sperm). I was 20 and now I'm 7months on HRT :)

I understand not feeling valid enough for HRT the best way I can put it is: put aside the validity of your trans identity, do you want all the effects of HRT despite the "downsides"? you don't have to be trans to get HRT.

I've progressively come to the realisation that I do indeed want GRS, I always wanted FFS and GRS felt less important, but as time goes on I realise that, I'm never going to have a fullfilling sex life with my current equipment...

I haven't had FFS or GRS yet, but I've been on hormones for a while.

before HRT I was pretty depressed, the culprit was the fact that no matter what I did my body got worse (more masculine). For example: I hated shaving because I had to, I was horrified that shaving might make my beard grow faster (it doesn't but it does make it more visible), so for years I would pluck it out in the hopes that it would slow down and stop spreading but it kept creeping up to other areas of my face. I couldn't do anything .

That wasn't the only thing, my face, my hairline, my body, my voice, everything was always getting worse. ::: spoiler TW I genuinely thought about committing suicide. :::

At one point it genuinely got really bad and I decided that I would stop living as others expected me to, that day I started transitioning, I came out to my parents about two months later and 3.5 months after that I started HRT.

Starting HRT is really magical the first day you're super excited but nothing really happens for like 48h, then if the treatment is correct (correct dosage) you start to feel pretty tired for a week or two, this is because testosterone kinda acts like caffeine in a way and gives you a lot of energy, you get used to it fast though and then the changes start coming in. More importantly though, you know for sure at that point that things aren't getting any worse and that probably is the most HRT will do for your mental health.

Mentally the first month was a roller-coaster going from "Yipee i got HRT!!! 🎉" to "is this thing even working?☹️" (it is working it's just slow, manage your expectations!), estradiol kicks in and suddenly you feel things it's strange but stuff feels more vibrant, music(for me) became insanely good one day and I've been listening to so much music since, it's crazy. That could 100% be because I was less depressed but I have a feeling it's not only that.

Then the physical changes start, you actually don't notice them, but I just took pictures every month an yeah things are definitely changing so that feels really good! It does feel unreal, like I have boobs now that's the coolest shit ever!!! you get used to your body but things like hips and breasts still amaze me when I see them.

I'm not fully where I want to be but I actually kinda like my body and I would have told you that was impossible a few years back.

Yeah, call me old fashioned XD Thanks for your replies :)

My country has a small queer community and an even smaller portion of ppl who are tech savvy enough to use mastodon. And an even tinier portion might live in my region.

I should maybe make a post to see how it goes but tbh I'm not getting my hopes up...

There might not be big enough of a community though :(

I probably should yeah 👍

:P I'm good, if things go south I can count on you?

Thanks a lot! 💖

I think it’s important to realize that if people are around you and being friendly they likely don’t think you’re a freak

That's helpful thank you! I've got a pretty big network of friends, I'm terrified at the idea of trying to flirt with one and destroying whatever relationship we had.

Be confident and love yourself.

That's not easy to do, I should probably go talk to a therapist about it, my self confidence has always been in the toilet, it's getting a bit better with hrt I think.

Thank you yes, it could be a reason why but, idk being confident seems easy to say, in practice I can only seem confident even right now, I'm not where I want to be though.

🫂 I don't want to have to use a dating app but to be fair it might be impossible without😮‍💨

Yep, all my games just work, to be honest it takes me less time to setup my gaming rig on Linux than windows, and it feels solid as hell. If I have a Linux PC I can get steam in a few seconds and start playing just like that!

Exactly! I look at my pictures from 6 months ago and I look so different already, I can't wait to make the comparison in a year and more!

It's been ok, I've been studying math since I need to catch up for when school starts again, it's going to be hard but math is the only subject where I have a difficult time.

Just In case, you might have replied to the wrong person, thank you very much nonetheless<3

I haven't had any luck finding a comp sci internship

Don't beat yourself up, me neither it's really hard idk why :/

I've got a few transmasc friends but they aren't really tech savvy or interested in tech overall :(

I need to root my phone...

I'm only weak when she talks to me.😔

JD Vance moment

I... Uhm... N-need a girl... T-to do thi-that, to me...

Oh gosh I'm so sorry! I'm going to put a TW in the title.

Hey Olivia 👋

I'm also 6months on HRT!💖💕

Things are going pretty well, my body is finally looking ok-ish!✨

I still have to find the confidence to stop boymoding, but I have to wait until laser hair removal is fully done on my beard, because I can't hide it with makeup sadly (pitch black hair)😠

Also I want my hair to be longer but it's curly and takes ages to grow, it's going to look good I feel! 🤩

Can you DIY?

Please be strong 🫂

Thank you!!😊 They are still small but with the way things are going they might get bigger :D

🫂💙🫂💖🫂🤍🫂💖🫂💙🫂

I mean every social media has good and bad places ofc but for me linkedin has been the worse, idk it felt like I was looking at my bosses jokes and forced to laugh otherwise they'd fire me.

Immutable doesn't mean unbreakable though.

Linkedin is the worse social media out there even twitter isn't that bad compared to it.

Yes this is now my opinion the finns are ALL gay.

It is if you're in a room full of other naked dudes...

my body thinks I'm a generational athlete or something, I eat like a pig but it all goes into muscles and energy, so now I'm 52kg but hey if you need someone to run for an hour straight I'm your girl...

FRENCH 👏 RIGHTS 👏 ARE 👏 HUMAN 👏 RIGHTS 👏🇫🇷🇫🇷🇫🇷🇫🇷🇫🇷

Because they could steal our tech? I'd say fill them with explosives

I think it's SERM's, sounds cool! Good luck on your journey :)

I dunno I don't listen to mainstream music, Gojira, Lorna shore and LoG are good and they are relatively new bands, so music definitely isn't going to shit, it's just that given a good song there is a high probability it didn't come out this year since good music has existed for many years. (Hopefully that makes sense)

OMG thank you so much that was so kind and informative 💜💜💜

And yeah I agree having people that know about your gender identity tell you that you look fem without justification feels like they're just trying to please you. In that sense not being out as a trans woman is great because people comment on your femininity and you know it's genuine even though it can be used as an insult (call me a lesser man I'll nearly enjoy it lmao).

And yeah hang in there Hugu it's not easy, I'm sure you'll look the way you want soon enough!💜 Can I ask if you are considering HRT?

Really kind comment, thanks a lot! ☺️💜