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::: spoiler Image Transcription (A 4Chan "green-text" titled "Take the cat pill anons" with a photograph of a black cat lying on the carpet) be me depressed, loner, NEET, live at my parents house one day we get a cat, whatever cat hates me for whatever reason is always super cuddly with parents but constantly barfs near me or on my things never lets me pet him or play with him also meows really aggressively around me for no reason try playing with him, he isn't interested and keeps meowing try feeding him, he keeps meowing literally just always meowing as loud as he can around me, it's annoying as hell trying to play clone hero while parents are gone and cat is meowing like always starts walking all over my desk, I've had it with this fucker just start meowing back at him, louder than him, it scares him off and he goes hiding somewhere parents get home and look for him, can't find him anywhere, ask if I let him out we tear the house apart trying to find him, look everywhere, we came to the conclusion that he must've got out somehow and that was that ffw tomorrow night, cat comes out of nowhere from upstairs and rubs all over my legs as l'm standing in the kitchen where-tf-were-you-little-shit.jpeg cat is suddenly very friendly with me and always wants to be near me I start warming up to him as well, it's nice having a cat on your lap while gaming/watching TV noticed I'm feeling less depressed lately, cat is still super friendly with me, even sleeps in my bed now Mfw no longer depressed cause I meowed at a cat in frustration Guess I'm a cat person now bots :::
cross-posted from: https://sh.itjust.works/post/24674909
::: spoiler Image Transcription (A 4Chan "green-text", with a picture of Pepe crying) be me 3 years ago 16 years old Not many friends. Feel alone as hell, see everyone partying and shit and I'm sitting around at home. Classmate at school talking about going out for a drive with friends. Looks at me "Hey anon! Your a funny dude, how about you join us" Heart skips a beat, this is all I have ever wanted. We go out eat some Chipotle, go too Walmart and fuck around there. Buy like 15 king sized kit Kats for shits n giggles. Finally they dropped me off at home I hate home, mom is terrible. Obvious frown Friendo looks at me "hey.. we'll see you around anon. You fit right in. Smiled and nodded Walked inside room and cried happiness cry. :::
cross-posted from: https://lemy.lol/post/29860456
cross-posted from: https://sh.itjust.works/post/23810182
::: spoiler Image Transcription (A 4Chan "green-text", with a picture of Pepe crying) friend invites me to his twitch stream has a decent following we start playing some Vydia and talking people start commenting about how funny l am the next day people ask if he can have me on the stream again Wow, it felt nice. :::
cross-posted from: https://sh.itjust.works/post/23421948
cross-posted from: https://sh.itjust.works/post/23186052
::: spoiler Image Transcription (A 4Chan "green-text", with a picture of SpongeBob and Patrick) Be me in army mandatory in my shitty country first time we noob soldiers fire our guns we lay in the ground and get ready drill instructor yells "are you ready?" i yell back "ai ai captain" random guy two rows away yells " i cant hear you" drill instructor mad and tries to find out who mocked him i yell again "oooooo" random guy shots a rock 10 meters in front of him from laughter ( the target was 300 meter away) dust rises up and one general runs and screams at drill instructor we march back to camp 10 kilometers instead of driving i am attending the "i cant hear you" guy wedding next week :::
cross-posted from: https://sh.itjust.works/post/23052813
cross-posted from: https://sh.itjust.works/post/23005021
::: spoiler Image Transcription (A 4Chan "green-text", titled "positive dad stories thread", with a picture of Pepe) be me, 9 own a toy firetruck god-i-fucking-love-my-fire-truck-.jpg bring to show and tell kids make fun of firetruck go home tell dad dad tells me not to worry about it next day dad wakes me up for drive to school pass school "dad where are we going?" "my friends want to meet you anon" pull up to firehouse dad told his firefighter friends what happened get tour of firehouse and meet real firemen get to honk real firetruck horn my-face-when my dad took off work just to make me feel better over some stupid toy truck :::
cross-posted from: https://sh.itjust.works/post/22824291
cross-posted from: https://sh.itjust.works/post/22730480
cross-posted from: https://sh.itjust.works/post/22728403
::: spoiler Image Transcription (A 4Chan "green-text" with a picture of a Roblox Character dressed in shiny gold clothing) be me like 12 years ago someone asks me if I want robux sure! whats your password its "ilovebeatles123321" they log in actually fucking get a transaction on my account they buy me lifetime Outrageous Builders Club 800 Robux as well literally just log out and then tell me to change my password I still have no idea how my 13 year old self was not scammed :::
::: spoiler spoiler (A 4Chan "green-text", with a picture of Pepe chuckling) have two dogs ask them "who's a good dog!?" never tell them who it's them :::
::: spoiler Image Transcription (A 4Chan "green-text".) married, with a six year old daughter wife hates violent video-games and doesn't want me playing them with daughter in same room my little girl loves some of the violent stuff, but I do draw the line obviously she absolutely loves, loves, loves Raiden, Sam, and the Metal Gear Rising: Revengeance cast of characters. Mostly likes Raiden and Sam over the rest of them. get a phone call from school, saying she was in a fight. have to leave work and address this mess principal explains to me that she punched a boy who made fun of her, stood over him and said, "Show me a good time, Jack." I almost, almost started to laugh and had to brush it off like a cough. had to ball my fist over my mouth, excuse myself. "Anon, do you have any idea where she learned this?" "No sir, but I will talk to her about it." We made it five steps into the parking lot before l lost my shit, imagining my daughter standing over some little shit with her arms spread saying, "Show me a good time, Jack." got her ice cream, had a heart to heart, and had to play it down when wifey got home Kids are a treat sometimes. :::
::: spoiler Image Transcription (A 4Chan "green-text", titled "Altruism", with a close-up photograph of a turtle on the pavement) Riding bike through town See something strange on the side of the road Decide to stop and investigate It's a turtle tucked into its shell Hold finger in front of shell Turtle pokes its head out, sniffs finger, and then retreats back into it's shell It's a hot day, and there are no bodies of water nearby There's a river a few miles away, decide to take the turtle there Ride bike with one hand while holding the turtle People look at me strangely Don't care, the turtle is all that matters Turtle pokes its head out when going fast downhill Probably the fastest the turtle has ever gone Finally reach the river Set the turtle on the shore under some shade After about 10 seconds the turtle crawls into the water Looks back at me before submerging and swimming away Feel more emotion in that moment than I have in the last few years Despite my mistakes and shortcomings, a creature's life was made better by my existence Is using our time to help others the real answer? :::
::: spoiler Image Transcription (A 4Chan "green-text" titled "The elderly is wise", with a black-and-white portrait photograph of an elderly woman staring into the camera) Be me, lonely guy in Britain Get in the public transport to get back home Sit next to a lovely old lady who smiled at me Have a little talk She tells me really interesting stuff and we have some laughs together She tells that this day se would've been celebrating his brother's birthday but he is gone We keep talking She tells me a heartwarming advise: 'I could stay indoors and think about bad things, instead, I decide to go outside, see things, smile at people, they smile back at me, there is no point of being sad and angry at home' Actually I feel like if I listened some sort of prophet She gets to her stop and leaves, we say Happy Christmas to each other Elderly deserve respect, I'll probably join as a volunteer to some kind of organisation that helps them. :::
::: spoiler Image Transcription (A 4Chan "green-text", with a photograph of a lake in the early morning) be me 22 visiting parents see younger sister for first time in years 13yo TikTok kid who listens to the same 5 songs spend day driving around and listening to music with her have drinks with dad that night spend night in basement office room is below hers hear her listening to a bunch of the songs I played in the truck I feel accomplished as a big brother. :::
::: spoiler Image Transcription (A 4Chan "green-text", with a drawing of Pepe driving whilst looking down at a puppy on the passenger seat) be me be loser who drives a delivery van all day work is fucking boring as fuck get new puppy puppy is sad when I go to work have idea I will take puppy to work with me Next day put puppy in van Puppy sits shotgun all day, does not piss or poop in cab Take puppy to park during lunch break Puppy waits patiently while I make deliveries Drive home Realize work was fun with my little puppy buddy Have never had this much enjoyment of work Thank you puppy :::
::: spoiler Image Transcription (A 4Chan "green-text", with a pencil sketch of a girl looking at a flower) finals are near cant concentrate on studying because a lot of stuff in my mind lately first exam is on thursday, history. fuck.png talk to mom i love my mom "i used to love history, fem-anon. stayed up until 4am reading everything i could, it's beautiful" she motivates me to study thanks to her passion read first topic hey, this ain't that bad be thrown aback because dates and weird ass names mom comes in room "i made you some roasted chestnuts" be one of my favourite winter desserts "continue studying sweetie, good luck! i know u can do it!" im gonna do this for you mom. im gonna have the greatest grades i can achieve. i love you mom. i'll make you proud, i swear. :::
::: spoiler Image Transcription (A 4Chan "green-text", with a photograph of a grape vine bearing two luscious bunches of green grapes) be me live in california extremely hot lately out for a walk because i need exercise taking dirt path come across a short Mexican man selling fruit with his son browse his fruits, they're all ripe and juicy man and son are both just smiling at me I realize i don't have my wallet try to explain that i have no money and start to turn to leave hear them talking in rapid-fire Spanish then the man hollers "Senor! quieres uva?" don't know what "uva" is but i say yes he hands me a bunch of green grapes like picrel i try again to say i have no money then the son says "he know, he say you look hungry" in broken english thank them over and over eat the grapes on my walk literally the best grapes i've ever eaten if i ever see them again i'm going to pay them 5x the cost of those grapes. thank you senor uva :::
::: spoiler Image Transcription (A 4Chan "green-text", with a picture of Pepe wearing a blue starry wizard hat and holding a star-topped wand) at a stop light light is red "go green.... NOW" still red "go green... NOW" still red "go green... NOW" turns green my-face-when :::
::: spoiler Image Transcription (A 4Chan "green-text" titled "Bug Bro", with a photograph of a praying mantis) 15 year old daughter suddenly got an extreme interest in mantises decide to buy her one she cares for it like a baby, honestly surprised at her responsibility over her pet she wants me to hold it but I don't wanna eventually she wears me down and I do it the damn thing looks me in the face when it's not focused on the tricks she makes it do (jump from hand to hand, etc) daughter tells me it can eat all sorts of meat what the hell feed it a piece of steak IT EATS IT FROM MY HAND have been bonding with the mantis ever since I never thought I could get this invested in a bug. :::
::: spoiler Image Transcription (A 4Chan "green-text" with a picture of Wojak) my mom left school at 16 due to poverty never showed much interest in books, music etc retired last year has since been reading through all the books I left in boxes at home her enthusiasm for reading is so pure l feel bad for not enjoying reading that much these days she kept asking me if I was writing a book and said she could "never do that" picked up the hint and encouraged her to give it a go, without getting my hopes up that-feeling-when she sent me a story she wrote about two rabbits who become friends that-feeling-when it made me cry and feels more honest than anything I've written How to cope with this feel bros? l love my mum so much. :::
::: spoiler Image Transcription (A 4Chan "green-text", with a picture of a seal plushie) Title: my Christmas experience be me an 18 year old autistic kid who likes stuff animals tell my older brother about these round seal plush toys from japan that are really cute brother probably not paying too much attention I assumed so I forgot I told him ast forward to December 25th brother hands me a flat package I think it's a shirt or something I open it up I find a very flattened small version of the seal pillow I told him about I am very happy and tell him how much I love it thanks brother :::
::: spoiler Image Transcription be me (A 4Chan "green-text", with a picture of Pepe wiping a tear from his eye) in highschool decide to give the quiet kid a chance, he seems alright my friend and i approach him "hey dude yeah wassup u alright" he has like no one to talk to he gives in 6 months go by, we are talking like usual since i like to talk to lots of different people, people always come to talk to me also, since quiet kid has no one he just kinda sticks by me most times overtime, we talk less; other people see that he is likeable and hang out with him at school eventually, we stop talking no problem, my main intention was for him to have friends anyway fast forward months later schools ended check his instagram story its him and his friends from our old highschool hanging out see it quite frequently now proud of him mission passed, glad that he actually has friends now :::
::: spoiler Image Transcription (A 4Chan "green-text", with an image of giga-chad doing a thumbs-up) Dating a blind girl All of her friends are blind Love that she holds my arm when we're out Love that she eventually got used to my apartment and can now navigate around by herself Love that her guide dog is super friendly and is always on the job to help her. Love that her family sees me as a great person because her being blind doesn't bother me Love that she doesn't use the internet because it's too much hassle Love that she requests I read new books for her in my voice and record them so she has her own boyfriend audiobook library. :::
::: spoiler Image Transcription (A 4Chan "green-text", with a picture of Luigi) be me 9 at the time playing Luigi's Mansion for the first time get to the piano ghost melody develop crush on her force parents to buy me a keyboard and take me to piano lessons ›eventually get really good at it fast-forward 3 years playing the piano at some department store while waiting for my mom to finish shopping girl from my school sees me "wow anon i didn't know you played that good" turns out she's also a piano *removed* get her number fuckyeah.jpg fast-forward to today still with her going to college probably gonna major in music my-face-when this all started cuz i had a crush on some ghost *removed* from Luigi's Mansion thanks Luigi :::
::: spoiler Image Transcription (A 4chan "greentext", with an image of Pepe wearing a pink Wizard's hat) Be me, sleep deprived DM, half an hour ago Get startled by phone ringing It's one of my players Me: "Dude, it's midnight, you good?" Friend: "Yeah yeah, sorry if I woke you. Could I ask for a favor?" OhGod HeKilled Someone.gif Me: "Uh, sure? Shoot." Friend: "My daughter can't sleep, could you tell a quick story over speakerphone? She loves listening to the recordings of our sessions before bed, but I left my laptop at the office so I can't play them." NaniTheFuck.mp3 Me: "She listens to us to fall asleep?" Friend: "Yeah, but she really likes your plot and NPC acting bits. She calls you 'dumb dumb mister! Guess Dungeon Master is a bit hard for a preschooler." Me: "Wow... well, if it will help her sleep, then sure." Friend: "Thank you! Okay, give me a sec to head back to her room." (pause) "Okay, you're on speaker." Me: "Hey, [daughters name], it's uncle Anon." Daughter: (Happy gasp) "Dumb dumb Mister!" I'veNeverBeenHappierToBeCalledADumbDumb.jpg Me: "You ready for a story about...(DM IMPROV SKILLS ENGAGE)...the time your daddy and his friends went deep into a cursed temple to save a frost dragon egg?" Daughter: (Incomprehensible happy squealing noises) I then proceed to spend nearly 20 min spitballing a story over the phone for the most fascinated little girl until she eventually fell asleep. Friend thanks me for the help and says he'll see me on game night. Lay down in bed, actually feel content and comfortable for once. I should have thanked him. I am the dumb dumb mister. :::